The World's Shortest Travel Blog

So it seems that this could be the worlds shortest travel blog.  Unfortunately the Guinness Book of Records does not have a category for shortest travel blog ever, we may never know.

The calcium pools at Pammukale - sans Russians

About eight or so days ago I started to get a droopy eye (left, for those of you who are now asking).  It was just after we were at Pammukale and so I attributed it to a reaction to all the Russian bikini fashion crime that I had seen at the calcium pools (no photographic evidence for the protection of others).

Anyway HRH Princess Jemima diagnosed it as the need for a better prescription.  Dave thought it might be a tumour (but I think that was just so he could make reference to his favourite actor in his favourite film: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OaTO8_KNcuo).  I thought perhaps allergic reaction...so I upped my antihistamine.  But the dropping eye (or bung eye from hereon in) persisted.  It persisted through the ruins at Cannakale and again as we toured the sites of Gallipoli. HRH had to point out to several people that this was not a normal look for me.

Anyway eventually I was convinced that I should call my travel insurance. We hotfooted it back to Istanbul and sought the help from the German hospital in Istanbul (not sure why there is a German hospital in Istanbul, but I was grateful).  On arrival at the hospital we met Denise who was to follow me around translating when the helalth professional didn't speak english.  I was extremely grateful for her presence but the two interns she had with her that day were an addition I could do without.   The opthalmologists took a look at me and puffed air into my eye.  She was not convinced of the diagnosis and suggested I needed the help of a neurologist.  This made me cry, which prompted her to say through her translator that it was NOT a diagnosis and she didn't understand why I was crying.  Little did she know that I was lamenting the travel plans that I had the next day to Amman, Jordan.  Since seeing Indiana Jones (in 2010, I know a crime in itself) I had great plans for my trip to Jordan.   I knew the words 'neurologist' mean that I was not going anywhere.  I didn't really understand how true my prediction would come - for the next 10 hours I didn't go anywhere but the hospital.  From consulting room to reception to consulting room to CT (thorax), to MRI (eye and brain) and then finally I was released and I could make my way to get an EMG.  For those of you who don't know what an EMG is stay tuned.  We arrived at the 18:30 appointment to a packed waiting room - at least 10 people ahead of me and I had not eaten since 8 am that morning and I had taken a bus at 01:30 that morning to get to Istanbul.  I had no idea what kind of doctor I was going to see this time - but I realised he was a big news kind of doctor when I looked around the waiting room and noticed that not a single person was on their own and many people had more than one person with them, they also had the harbinger of negative medical news - the MRI scan!  I am not going to sound all ungrateful and say that I had to wait a while, this doctor had fitted me in at the last minute of a long day.  Little did I know how much he was going to enjoy perform this EMG.  Before he started he performed an ice test, which is what is says on the label.  Ice applied to the eyelid for a minute thirty.  If you want to know how long a minute thirty (eternity) is just put an ice cube on your eyelid. Anyway, onto the said EMG.  The EMG involves sticking a very fine needle electrode into my muscle and jabbing it about with increasing intensity.  So as he was jabbing this very fine needle around in my eye muscle he was also muttering 'perfect, perfect' under his breath.  I couldn't help but think he was enjoying this!  I was not.  He did the same test on my left arm.  After this test which I couldn't help but thinking seemed a bit quack-like (too much time with Skeptic Dave!) he was able to confirm the neurologists suspicion of myasthenia gravis.

Back for almost a thousand dollars worth of blood tests (boy was I glad that I took out medical insurance).  I wasn't due to pick up my medical tests until at least 3pm so we all went outside (Dave and HRH were along for the ride today) and I ate my breakfast that they had lovingly stolen for me from the buffet that morning.  As I was (practically) in the car park eating my breakfast there appeared the neurologist.  She must have some kind of tracking device on me.  She examined me in said car park and whisked me up to her consulting rooms and gave me a prescription for some medication and orders to return an hour after I had taken one.  We walked the Taksim square area checking bung eye every minute or so to see if there had been an improvement, we thought there had and trundled back to the hospital.  She was happy with the progress and ordered me to return at 4pm that day.  HRH had to depart at this point to get her flight to Australia.  And Dave and I visited Istanbul Modern - an excellent gallery.  Back at the hospital Uzm. Dr Melahat Değirmenci Eser delivered the deadly blow - we would have to return to my own country for some supervised treatment.  I thought having to go from the opthalmologist to the neurologist sucked, but this really sucked.  Oh well, I tried to stay positive.  I would get to have yum cha shortly.  Perhaps some tuna mornay too.  And I wouldn't have to eat a cold boiled egg with cucumber and olives for breakfast for a while.

A whole lot of waiting and tooing and froing and the travel insurance company agreed to send both Dave and I back to Australia.  We have coverage for resumption of travel (phew), but be warned resumption of travel means being dropped back into where you were taken ill.  Not so convenient if you were supposed to be in the US by the time you get better.  For a fee (of almost AUD3K) they could have made the flight return to London instead of Istanbul.  But I thought that was a little pricey since Kyaak tells me that is should cost (AUD340).

Anyway the key message to this post is that I am going back to Australia and will see you all soon (if you live there).  Fingers crossed that I get to take up their offer of resumption of travel.  I might just fancy a breakfast of cold boiled egg, cucumber and olives.  I have to say that the medical treatment that I received at Alman Hastanesi was excellent.  The neurologist and her assistant Özge were really lovely and the fact that Denise was always there to help me (and make the occasional joke) was excellent.